guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
