Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
So much rum. So many feels.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
