is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
