Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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