Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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