A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
