I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
