Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
