Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize