Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
