I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
