Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
