Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I love having hate sex.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
