feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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