whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize