anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
