Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
