Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
nutella sex= disaster
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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