if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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