Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
