If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
