I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize
