ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
