from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
There's always time for handjobs
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
