Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
