I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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