Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
