That's intense
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
