If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
try to milk me bitch
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