Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
