U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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