Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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