I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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