Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
