it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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