he wants to bone in the snuggie
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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