***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
