if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
