yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
