there was a trapeze. enough said
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
