great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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