I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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