Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
