Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
