If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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