No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
