i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
