after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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