How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
