dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
